LIVING IN LITTLE ITALY

When I became entangled with the man I would marry, I was living with a gaggle of girlfriends in a boarding house arrangement near Columbia. Obviously, there was no privacy there, so we had to find a place. His mother and stepfather lived, and his stepfather had his business, in one of those rambling, enormous apartments on West End Avenue which included as a sort of adjunct to the main property an upstairs maid’s room.  These were no longer used for that purpose but as storerooms. However, since they had originally been habitations, they included a bathroom. 

We had between us, practically no money, and could not really afford a room in one of the seedy boarding house apartments in the Columbia area which housed students and both amateur and professional drug dealers, as well as other lost souls. We were both going to school. I was in summer school, supporting myself, if it can be called that, with a part time job at Macy’s selling women´s rayon underpants, and M who had just finished a stint in the Navy, which he had joined at the age of 16, was at Columbia. 

My husband to-be-decided that we should live in his family maids room.  There was a bed, or was it just a mattress, and a jumble of discarded furniture in the room but it was a bit of heaven plus The Ritz after the boarding house.

We moved in stealthily, although I would bet the doorman knew what was up and he may have informed on us. I thought it was terrifically romantic, a La Boheme. I was, by the way, at the age of 19 to 20 pretty much a congenital idiot, with a sense of reality that might have been useful to MGM´s or Disney’s fantasy production department but it wasn’t much help to me.

We would wait until no one was likely to be in the kitchen of the apartment downstairs and then sneak in to eat.  We were caught at this one day by M´s step- father, one of two musical copyists in the US. A musical copyist is a man, or woman, who copies out a composer’s handwritten score in a clear, precise hand. These were then printed on scored pieces of paper. Although there had been numerous attempts to invent one, there was no typewriter that could type out musical notes. It had to be done by hand. I don’t know if this is still true.

He, of course, told M´s mother and we were gently ordered to move into M´s bedroom. I was in awe of the apartment and M´s mother and stepfather. I was in awe of their world which I perceived as a glittering New York production full of famous people—Giancarlo  Menotti, Bernstein, Casals.  For reasons I have difficulty comprehending, M’s mother decided that I was just what was needed to get her wayward, motorcyclist son on the straight and narrow, which just shows how mistaken an intelligent woman can be.

Once we both found jobs, very low paying, while I continued to go to Barnard College, we decided to move out. Of course, I wanted to move to The Village but The Village was no longer what my romance addled brain believed it to be—a low rent haven for artists. I discovered this as every week I went down to wait for the first copies of THE VILLAGE VOICE to come off the press. There were a small crowd of us waiting for those copies, all looking for apartments and trying to get an edge on the market.

Slowly I realized that we were not likely to find an apartment we could afford in The Village but just below that neighborhood, above Canal Street was an area known as Little Italy where there were a few Village exiles in residence among the Italians. I discovered you found out about apartments in this community by walking it’s streets, which were narrow, full of small stores and barrows selling vegetables and fruit while looking for small wreathes mounted among the bells at street level, announcing the death of an occupant. You then had to find out the telephone number of the agent who ¨ran¨ the building. You did that by asking anyone coming out of the building—they didn’t seem to mind supplying this information–or sometimes the agent’s number was on a printed card in the front hall. 

To my great elation and excitement, one day I sighted such a small, purple ribboned wreath on a panel of doorbells on a building on Broome Street. I called the agent and saw the apartment the next day. It was 65 dollars a month for four rooms, up five, panting, floors. I signed immediately. 

Since M was working, the cleaning of the apartment was largely my problem. The woman who had died had been an immigrant from Naples in her 70´s. I presume her children were ashamed of her. It quickly became apparent that they had rarely if ever visited. She wrote them messages on the walls of her bedroom in a delicate cursive script in a mixture of Italian and English. The Italian was simple enough for me to understand. As I scrubbed out her messages full of love and loneliness, I cursed them.

There was no bathroom as such. There was a toilet in a sort of closet with a window onto the street in the kitchen which also contained a large sink and a small sink as well as a stove and refrigerator. The other tenants used the large sink as a tub. The son of neighbors told me that a fat woman on one of lower floors had stuck in her large sink and her female neighbors had come in and greased the sink with Vaseline until she could skid out.

The apartment’s floors were layered with fifty years of linoleum. I pulled this up and M took it downstairs layer by layer over weeks. Under those layers was an absolutely, pristine pine floor that had apparently never been trod on and some brittle yellow newspapers from the 1930´s which disintegrated in my hands. We did keep linoleum on the kitchen floor but bought our own.

I washed all the walls and tried to wash the ceiling. We bought a prefabricated metal shower. The arrival of this was a phenomenon for the neighbors who all bathed in their sinks. Many of the neighbors, particularly those who were single women kept their front doors open all day until they went to bed to keep track of what was going on in the building. Gossip in Little Italy was as indigenous and ineradicable as garlic. These women were a huge deterrent to theft, although I doubt that there are many thieves in a Mafia neighborhood. When I took my first shower, I forgot that the kitchen window had no curtain. The neighbors across the street lined their windows before I realized that I was exposed. 

I leapt back into the shower stall and called for my husband who arriving with a large towel, bowed deeply to the serried ranks of neighbors.  We all laughed. Well, I did a bit uncomfortably. Curtains went up the next day.

We were a source of open or clandestine curiosity to our neighbors. There was only one other non-Italian tenant in the building, a musician who also lived on our floor. His female neighbors worried about him so much that they left plates of food, covered with another plate at his door.

The kitchen, the first room you entered was, like all the rooms  shoebox shaped. The windows looked across the street into other windows. But the neighborhood was a neighborhood. Everyone knew everyone.

After a year my husband tired of climbing five flights and wanted to move. I was sorry to lose my neighbors but decided we should go to Europe rather than move. A week later I realized I was pregnant but that didn’t change my mind about Europe.

THIS YEAR IN BANGKOK: 24th FEB

The jet lag is gone, mostly. My mind and soul have integrated into Bangkok. I have been to my favorite Paragon Mall bookstore, it´s a Japanese chain, have eaten in several of my favorite restaurants in the basement of the Paragon Mall and have made an appointment for a manicure and pedicure.

To my unspeakable delight the girl who made my appointment said, ¨ I remember you.¨ It feels good to have made even just a visual impression.

I have had lunch with my designer friend K, now largely retired although there are a few favored women whom he still designs for. I have gone to my gym in the Anantara Hotel and been welcomed by my old acquaintances there. In other words I have been sorting out my life here, finding my old grooves.

One of the reasons the gym at the Anantara is so special is that you are surrounded by wood, a gleaming teak floor, a teak wall on one side and on the other a huge spread of plate glass that looks onto a little strip of garden about three feet deep and twelve feet long. There used to be two squirrels that played among the plants, but they are no longer there.  I hope they found a better accommodation somewhere.

My lunch with C was in one of those store front restaurants that

no foreigner is likely to find unless they have lived here for years 

and years, and if they found it they might not have the courage to try it out unless it was in their neighborhood. We had curried crab and chicken with ginger and pea pods, and something else that I have forgotten.  Great plumes of lettuce, long green beans and other raw vegetables came on a plate for us to chose from.

If I eat alone, I usually go to Taling Pling, a Thai restaurant with windows looking out on a narrow strip of palms and shrubbery on one side. On the other side it is one of the main corridors of restaurants in the Paragon Mall down which, tip-tip-tap on three-inch heels, young Thai women leading little girls in gigantic bows or little boys who have obviously been told to be good.

Drifting among them is the European population looking sweaty and ¨oil women¨ gliding in black robes, the abaya, often covered from long lower lashes to collar bones by black veils.

Here´s a tip on demystifying the abaya. If you want to know what the wearer is really wearing, look down at its hem. Often you will see a discreet line of denim and know that she is shopping in blue jeans against the rules.

Also these women, ¨oil women¨, and you will know if you don´t see denim, wear the kind of designer dresses that cause a gigantic cramp of envy that will send you to hell when you are in your shroud. But the inequality between us is balanced by the fact that they only get to show off their Chanels only when they are with each other in their, I suspect, palatial rooms.

Sometimes when I drift about the Paragon Mall I go into a reverie about what my life would have been like if I had moved here rather than to Spain. Would I have bought that white sectional sofa for my apartment overlooking the Chao Phaya River? It would look well with the blue background oriental in the window of the Iranian carpet store. And then there are beds and linens, silk sheets, outrageous hanging lamps, cut glass crystal chandeliers and kidney shaped glass tables.

The biggest temptation was the Chao Phraya River. I could spend all day watching it flow by with its passing bus boats, river taxis, long strings of barges pushed and pulled by tough, stout little green and yellow tugs that put up with no nonsense. It is a river to dream on, the Chao Phraya; it can whirl you back centuries to long boats paddled rhythmically by chanting men, the King´s gold boat with its high prow, small pea pod boats of commoners living in the canals dipping paddles from neighbor to neighbor. Their mornings still begin with vegetable boats, fruit boats, and boats bloody with beheaded chickens passing through the narrow canals. Boats with flowers in pots or cut. Line your terrace that overlooks the canal with pots of gardenias and have tea surrounded by their thick perfume.

Occasionally reality insists on intruding in the form of a dead dog, all four legs stiffly in the air drifting along, its own bloated boat.

But the gold spires of the Palace and the Temple of the Emerald Buddha flip you right back into fantasy.

Apropos of very little, except for perhaps fantasy, there is a story about how Siamese cats got the lump at the end of their tail. First, not all Siamese cats have this lump. Second, it is, in reality, caused by the cat´s tail being broken. Siamese cats have very fragile tails which are easily damaged. But to the story…

The King of Siam was at war in the north. His principal wife, learning of a plot by a noble to usurp the crown in his absence, wrote him a letter and attached it to her favorite cat´s tail by knotting it around the letter. She told him to find the King and deliver the message. The cat did and the kingdom was saved from rebellion. But as a sign of its service Siamese cats have retained the lump of the knot at the end of their tails.